For the past few days I have been discussing and debating the season finale of Insecure. Friends, colleagues and family members all have different views. For those of you who don’t have a HBO plug, and still haven’t seen it – please go away. No offense, I’m just about to give away major spoilers and I hate when people do that to me. For those of you who don’t live under a rock, I’m sure you’ve been having the same convos. Well, this show has made me take a serious look at myself, my friendships, the way I am in relationships and more.
Here’s what I learned from the season finale. By the way this is just my personal experience, so judge me not.
- Stay Active In Relationships
I like Lawrence. He’s cute. He’s obviously smart. He even has a nice savings account. But, he was NOT active in that relationship. There’s always a Chase Hoe and Daniel waiting in the wings and active relationships are what weed them away. Lawrence had the same sweat pants on for three episodes while Issa was out living her life. Go ahead, go re-watch. He initially appeared very content being stagnant and Issa felt like she settled. She returned home in episode 2 obviously still bothered and he dismissed it. In the words of one of my other favorite TV characters, “you want me, earn me!” (Olivia -scandal)
2. I’m Not Perfect but It’s Cool- My Friends Aren’t Either
So while I’m not as “free” as Molly, I connect with her. My career is going well and everything seems comfortable. But, I’ve had issues connecting in relationships and it bothers me. Therefore, that’s a part of my life I rarely discuss with others. I’ve been guilty of thinking I wish I had what “so and so” has on Facebook. Well here’s the thing we all have issues and try to appear like they aren’t there. Maybe we hide our problems like Issa or discuss the faults of others like Tiffany. Regardless, we’re trying desperately to seem in control of everything when really it’s okay that we’re not. Issa’s crew seemed so goals until they weren’t. They were a lot like me. Doesn’t mean they are not good people it just shows they’re human. It’s okay to be human.
3. Don’t be the Chase Hoe
Look. This girl. She said batteries. She could have at least fronted like she was gonna buy a laptop. It’s okay to show interest, it’s never okay to be thirsty. Lawrence was clearly hurt by what Issa did and knew he could hit up Tasha. Even though he had politely shaded her on a few occasions he knew she’d be ready and willing. Lawrence was lit and lonely and she was available. I hope she had fun because I doubt that will last. Be the priority not the option.
4. Dismiss the Allure of the Unknown
The unknown is a tricky and enticing thing. We’ve all heard about the 80/20 rule. Here’s an example, a guy never talks long on the phone because he has homework at night. Then you meet a guy who Facetimes every night and you begin to wonder would happen if you dated. Well, he could be the man of your dreams or he could ruin your relationship and use all your wifi. You just never know. Issa allowed that unknown chocolate attraction to mess up what she actually cared about, her relationship with Lawrence.
We hear it every day. But, it’s so real. Communication saved Issa’s friendship and the lack of it destroyed her relationship. In episode 7 Molly and Issa had that stressful argument. I think it hurt all of us. They know so much about each other, good and bad. Issa knew to defend Molly in the hot tub because she knew how much Tiffany and Kelly’s words were really hurting her. Molly knew to drive Issa back home because she knows how much Lawrence means to Issa. They know these things because they’ve talked about it. On the flip, Lawrence had no idea how unhappy Issa was for years. Issa had no idea of Lawrence’s passion and commitment to her until later in the season. It’s hard to have those conversations, but if you really want to make a relationship work, its required (BMJ voice) .
Once again I should be in bed. What did ya’ll think about the show/season finale? Tweet/IG me your thoughts!
- @askKirbyCarroll <3